A Woman As Wife and As Mother
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A Woman As Wife and As Mother

the role of wife is in some ways even more important and more vital. The wife who confuses the order of things and puts her child before her husband will most probably have a husband who feels neglected, and an unsatisfied husband may grow to resent any child who seems to take first place in his wife's life. The role of the mother is just as varied and important as that of the father. During the early years of child-rearing she devotes a great deal of her time to homemaking tasks.

Woman As Wife

Although the mother's role is important, the role of wife is in some ways even more important and more vital. The wife who confuses the order of things and puts her child before her husband will most probably have a husband who feels neglected, and an unsatisfied husband may grow to resent any child who seems to take first place in his wife's life. Since this wife may now lack a companion and lover, she sometimes attempts to make a "substitute husband" out of her child. She may also communicate frustration and low regard for her husband to the child, which may even cause the child to develop disrespect or even hatred for the father. When women insist on being wives first and mothers second, they enrich the lives of their husbands, children and selves.

Another basic fact a wife needs to understand is to accept her husband for what he is and not try to change him. Attempts to change a man usually end in nagging, which creates tension in the home. A wife needs to concentrate on her husband's good qualities and express admiration and appreciation for his physical, mental and spiritual capabilities. Tell your husband how smart, handsome, trim and wonderful he looks to you. Be understanding of the heavy burdens he shoulders - the difficulties and hardships he faces in bearing the financial responsibilities for the family. Be his biggest morale booster, and make home fun to return to - a haven from the rigors of the day. Your actions will encourage him to spend more time at home with you and the children. It is almost impossible for a man to feel tenderly about a woman who is constantly criticizing him or suggesting that he change.

Woman as Mother

The role of the mother is just as varied and important as that of the father. During the early years of child-rearing she devotes a great deal of her time to homemaking tasks. It is highly important during this crucial stage of adjustment, particularly if she has just resigned from the world of work, that she accepts her new responsibilities graciously and with enthusiasm. If she has just left full-time employment, which is customary for a great many young women today, it is likely to be a profession for which she trained for several years. Her career may have been rewarding and challenging. If she suddenly becomes a full-time homemaker, the switch in roles may not be easy. Her days at home may depress and bore her as she compares them to the stimulating interaction she used to find in a busy office. Co-workers may have depended on her professional opinions. Changing nappies and preparing formula milk or nursing baby can quickly melt from novelty to boredom.

Following childbirth a woman may find changes in her physical stamina. The process of giving birth may have sapped more of her energy than she realized. She may feel a physical and emotional letdown that only time can heal. It might be best if she and her husband postponed normal sexual relations for a few weeks following delivery. An even longer period of time may follow before she can enjoy sex to its fullest again, particularly if she wants to avoid another pregnancy. A wife needs tender, understanding support from her husband during this time.

Most importantly, a wife must learn to balance her role of wife and mother. The entrance of a child into the husband-wife relationship will necessitate a change in the couple's relationship. She needs to be alert to her husband's needs during this time so that the transition will go as smoothly as possible. She must be willing to leave the baby from time to time so that she can spend undivided time and attention with her husband. If at any time he begins to feel neglected, that he is playing second fiddle to a child, she is on dangerous ground. A wife who continues to meet her husband's need for appreciation, admiration and respect will help maintain his sense of identity and his feelings of security within the relationship.

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Comments (3)
Ranked #3 in Motherhood

You said it all right. A woman has to be a good wife and a good mother to her kids. Well written. voted up.

Two great careers in one person, tweeted and stumbled.

Marty Ward

Having a mutually supportive relationship is crucial to marital harmony. Mutual is the operative word here.

Mom was right, "You can't change the man." What you see is what you get. Within a mature relationship, a wife and husband can negotiate the give and take to have a satisfying life. Acceptance of who each other is and the willingness to encourage the growth and development of each others Talents, Abilities and Gifts makes for a rich and rewarding experience. A sustainable balance of children, work and time together is achieved by each person being in touch with their feelings and taking care of themselves as they are aware of the other's needs. As each person knows what they need to be fulfilled and expresses that clearly, a rich and satisfying marriage will result. Marty

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